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The Myster Crapper to Appear
on KROCK Radio Today!
We have been invited to appear
on Krock Radio in NYC (WXRK) today (April 27,
2005) between 3-3:30 PM EST. Listen in online
if you get the chance. www.krockradio.com
—TMC
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It's No Joke,
CQ is All New!
We have just (nearly) completed
a massive overhaul of the site with greatly expanded
Reviews, a reorganized Glossary and so much more.
Be sure to read our feature stories below, as well
as goodies we have dug up from the Archives. Our
next edition is going to be even more massive with
tons of new stuff. Enjoy! —TMC |
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London Calling
London is a great city with
tons of things to do all year long. On this visit,
we pit stopped in numerous West End pubs, Hampton
Court Palace and even the home stadium of Charlton
Football Club. Check out some of the best places
to "go" when in London in our London
Reviews section. |
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Tons of New Reviews
I spent the last few months
trying to dig up a ton of old places I had been
to in order to include them here on our list of
places to "go". All of these places have
been personally visited by me, the Mystery Crapper,
unless otherwise noted. |
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From the Archives - In a
Pinch
In this section, we highlight
funny crapping experiences from our readers. Read
stories like "The Very Stinky Poop Against
the Humble Clock" "The Turd Mutiny"
and "Tales from the Crapper - Bordello of Bleach"
to name a few. some of the funniest stuff you will
ever read. Have a funny story? Submit it to us and
we will add it! Go> |
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Camp Grounds at NASCAR
Race Martinsville, VA  
I'd like to tell you about
what me and my friends refer to as the Jeff Gordon
Grab Bag. There is a hill at the race track in
Martinsville. People camp out there and enjoy
the whole weekend. Drinking, partying, grilling,
and one row of Porta-Potties, over a 1/4 of a
mile away. Well one night after some serious drinking
JB had to go, and I mean bad. The problem was
he was stupified with alcohol, and he couldn't
walk that far. So he did the next best thing...dropped
trough, held onto the side of his truck bed and
leaned back. He was 100 yards or so from our camp
site, so we didn't care. The next morning someone
thought enough of it to place a pile of paper
towels over it as a warning of a land mine. It
worked great...UNTIL night came and someone stepped
on it, slipped (reminder, we were on a large incline)
and got their Jeff Gordon shirt covered in poo.
Hence a hilarious story to tell, and the name
of it...The Jeff Gordon Grab Bag!
User Friendliness = 2
Cleanliness = 1
Privacy = 0
Facilities = 0
Overall Rating = 1
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Hut in the Philippines,
Island of Luzon
i was on my way to a lovely
little resort in the philippines with my family,
when all of a sudden it hit me... you know, the
unstoppable force. unfortunately, we had an hour
or two to go before reaching our destination.
when i could hold it no longer i whispered to
my mommy (i was less than 10, and yet i remember
it so vividly) that i really had to go. so my
uncle stopped the car right in front of a grouping
of hut like homes in the middle of a bunch of
pineapple fields. i really wanted my mommy to
accompany me to ask the nice people if i, the
little white skinned girl which they will remember
forever (my dad is an american, i was there visiting
my mom's family) if i could kindly use their toilet,
if they had one. but, due to my mother's fear
of cats and the fact that there was a huge one
roaming about, my ninang had to take me. so, after
asking the lady i hopped onto their very high
toilet. it was clean enough, considering the circumstances.
usually i would have assumed the squat position
but the damn thing was too high. so i lined it
with toilet paper, perched my "puet"
(tagalog for butt) on there and did my business.
when i thought the ordeal was finally over, i
went to flush but it didnt work. i faintly remembered
my mom and aunts telling me before we embarked
upon our fateful trip that if, anywhere in the
phils, the toilet doesnt flush, put water in it.
but i had no idea what the in the hell they were
talking about. so i did nothing (i would later
look back and realize that pouring water into
the bowl would manually flush it)so, the moral
of the story is when in a hut, and the damn thing
will not dispose of the evidence, use the nearest
"tabo" (a plastic bowl with a handel
used for washing the rear... found in every filipino
home, so dont worry... it will be there)and just
wash that poo away. but preferably, dont doo doo
in a hut. plus, if you're white, they will remember
you even more... you guys aren't common out there!
User Friendliness = 1
Cleanliness = 2
Privacy = 2
Facilities = 0
Overall Rating = 1
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Glossary of Turds
Last, but definitely not least.
This is one of our most popular areas of the site.
Websters it ain't, but click on to check out the
most extensive Glossary of Turds we know of. You
will be amazed. Go> |
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